Why eloping in Wanaka or Queenstown isn’t selfish

Eloping in Wanaka or Queenstown might feel like a dream…

But then the guilt

creeps

in.

You can picture it. Standing on a mountain ridge, just the two of you, saying vows that feel raw and real, with only the wind and a photographer as witnesses. But then bam—you imagine the look on your mum’s face when she realises she won’t be there.

Here’s the thing: eloping doesn’t mean you love your people any less. It just means you’re choosing a wedding day that reflects who you are as a couple. And the people who love you most? They’ll come around when they see how much this decision matters to you.

Why couples choose to elope (and why it’s not selfish)

Couples who are eloping in Wanaka or Queenstown love the freedom to design a day that’s completely their own. More and more couples are saying “no thanks” to a big wedding. Not because they don’t care about family and friends, but because they want a day that feels:

✨ Intentionally intimate – When it’s just the two of you, there’s no performance, no timeline stress, no split attention. It’s about connection, not keeping everyone entertained.

✨ Freedom-filled – Want to get ready together? Say your vows barefoot by a lake? Hike into a secret alpine spot at sunrise? You get to write the rules.

✨ Focused on the marriage, not the production – Big weddings can take on a life of their own. An elopement strips it back to what actually matters.

✨ An unforgettable adventure – Whether it’s a heli-flight to Coromandel Peak, a sunset ceremony on the shores of Lake Wānaka, or a hike to a hidden spot by a waterfall, the experience becomes part of your story.

And here’s the best part: you can still celebrate with family later. A post-elopement dinner or party gives you the best of both worlds—intimacy on the day, then a toast with your favourite people afterwards.

Elopement vs intimate wedding – what’s the difference?

Both are stripped-back celebrations that focus on you, but here’s the simplest way to think about it:

	Elopement	Intimate Wedding
Guest count	Usually just you two (maybe 2 witnesses)	10–20 of your closest people
Style	Adventure, flexible timeline, zero formalities	Small-scale version of a wedding with a little more structure
Experience	A shared, private moment	Still intimate, but with your inner circle present

Really, you’re just deciding how much company feels right on the day.

This stunning St Bathans elopement shoot was captured by Anneke Lisa Photography, who perfectly balanced the moody lakeside vibes with soft, romantic detail shots. Her eye for timeless yet adventurous storytelling made this intimate styled shoot truly unforgettable.

How to tell your loved ones you’re eloping

This is the tricky part. Here’s how to share your plan gently but firmly:

Host a relaxed post-elopement dinner or backyard party to include them in the celebration.

Lead with your why
“We realised the most important part of the day is focusing on the two of us. We want our vows to feel really personal and private.”

Reassure them, it’s not about excluding anyone
“We’re still planning a small celebration when we get back so we can toast with everyone we love!”

Offer ways they can still feel involved

~ Ask loved ones to write you letters to read on the day.

~ Bring something sentimental from them (jewellery, a photo, or a family heirloom).

~ FaceTime them before or after the ceremony.

~ Hire a videographer so they can still witness the moment later.

This sunset lakeside elopement in Wanaka was photographed by Kate of Splendour Visuals, who captured the golden light, the raw emotions, and the breathtaking alpine backdrop with ease. A perfect blend of romance and adventure.

Best locations for eloping in Wanaka & Queenstown

If you’re going to elope, make it unforgettable. These locations are made for “just us” moments:

~ Coromandel Peak (Wanaka) – heli-accessed with sweeping lake and alpine views

~ Lake Lochnagar (Queenstown) – completely secluded and ridiculously beautiful

~ Moke Lake (Queenstown) – drive-accessible but still feels wild and remote

~ Glendhu Bay Lookout (Wanaka) – iconic but super easy for a low-key ceremony

~ Blue Lake (St Bathans) – epic clay cliffs, deep blue lake and mountains in the distance

Many couples planning a Wanaka elopement love the flexibility these spots offer—no strict rules, just stunning scenery.

This intimate forest elopement on Mt Crichton Loop Track was captured beautifully by Holly Wallace. Her adventurous style was perfect for the day.

How to decide between eloping and an intimate wedding

Take a minute and write down your top three priorities for your wedding day.

• If they look like privacy, adventure, zero fuss → elopement is your answer.
• If they look like connection, a touch of tradition, and sharing it with your nearest and dearest → an intimate wedding might be the sweet spot.
• If you wrote down dance floor chaos + extended family photos → stick with a bigger wedding!

There’s no right or wrong, just what’s right for you.

These joyful moments at a private Wanaka Airbnb were beautifully documented by Captured by Bie. Her relaxed, candid style matched the intimate feel of the day—full of laughter, connection, and all the perfectly imperfect in-between moments.

FAQ – What couples want to know about eloping

How much does it cost to elope in Wanaka or Queenstown?
It depends on how luxe you want to go, but most couples eloping in Wanaka or Queenstown spend $8,000–$15,000 (NZD) for a truly epic elopement here. A simple lakeside ceremony with a celebrant and a few hours of photography typically starts around $8,000–$10,000, while a heli-accessed mountain elopement with a top photographer, videographer, flowers, hair & makeup, and a private dinner could cost closer to $12,000–$15,000.

What’s usually included in an elopement?
Typically:

• Celebrant
• Photographer
• Hair + makeup
• Bouquet & buttonhole
• Location permit, if needed
  Optional extras include helicopter flights, a videographer, a private chef, or luxury accommodations.

How far ahead should we plan?
You can plan an elopement in a couple of months, but ideally allow 6–12 months to secure your dream photographer and book key vendors, especially in peak summer months.

Final thought

Choosing an elopement doesn’t mean closing the door on your family and friends. It just means you’re creating space for the wedding day that feels the most you, whether that’s two people on a mountain, or twenty people around a long table.

So… what’s your top three?

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Not sure if eloping in Wanaka or Queenstown is the right move or if an intimate wedding would feel better?

I help couples plan both—so you can have a wedding day that’s 100% yours.